Moving Pains

I just moved to the Windy City. On my way up here I picked up the stomach flu from my family and won't have my bed for a few days so I'm a little annoyed. Otherwise, I have a cozy little studio and a great view. I'll check the city out and decorate when I feel better.

Reflections on Haiti

Image via Wikipedia

I loved Haiti! And when I say this I don't mean that the rubble in Port-au-Prince (PAP) made my heart skip a beat and the poor little Haitian people living in tent cities were endearing. Stuff like that can be so cliche and ignorant. I love Haiti just because! Although probably still a bit cliche, its genuine. I don't have an explanation for why I love Haiti: I just do. Love is like that sometimes.

Despite the fact that I came to Haiti, after traveling around the world and back, I am happy that I have been privileged to have had those experiences to color my perspective and my dialogue with Haitians about Haiti.  I spent most of my time in Haiti at hospitals and in the medical school in PAP shadowing doctors and final year medical students.

I shared my visions and hope for Haiti. I guess, I expected more opposition. I have definitely received a lot of mixed reviews from people throughout my experience in the US and abroad. In general, I have gotten that sense that people think that my dream is well grounded but overly ambitious, presumptuous, and dangerous. Then there are people like my 85 year-old grandfather who prays to live to see a glimpse of the impact he is sure I will make in Haiti. I was expecting the medical students and doctors to have a similar spectrum of opinions and critiques.

I was ready; it feels like I have been fielding questions for years. I guess I was expecting something more along the lines of 'what makes you think you can just come to Haiti and open a medical school? We don't need your help. We have enough qualified physicians who have actually lived here their entire lives and are more dedicated to Haiti than some foreigner can ever be. You over zealous bleeding heart American liberals make me sick!'

I mean don't get me wrong, people were definitely, inquisitive, critical but nothing like I expected.  It took so little to convince people that I was serious and qualified. My resume was enough for the doctors that I shadowed and everyone else seemed to take the qualifications for granted: I am a medical student in the US, I was motivated enough to seek them out, and I had a plan. Everyone agreed that Haiti needs all the qualified and committed health professionals we can get. If I wanted to join the team, then I would be welcomed with open arms.

They were concerned with more practical limitations. Would I be able to adjust to life in Haiti,especially outside PAP? Would my future husband be willing to live in Haiti? Where would I send my future children to school? How long would my medical training take? How much debt would incur in the states? Would my debt in the states limit me from coming to Haiti? What kind of training did I plan on pursuing? How did I plan to keep the dream alive until after my training? What was my time line? Could I handle the mentality of the people? Would I be willing to learn French?

I was so ready to talk politics and philosophy that I was thrown off guard. Of course, I'll live in Haiti. I'm not married. I don't have children. What was this? It was real, that what it was. These are the kind of unplanned parts of like that have a way of diverting you if you don't think about them and prioritize them  as early as possible. And people wanted to see how thoroughly I had thought this through. I answered them as best as I could. But these ideas are certainly food for thought. And I grateful for the reality check and enthusiasm.

I've been re-energized by my experience in Haiti. A small part of me was afraid of the unknown but I should have known better. God would never have put a dream in my heart that was not mine to have. I know that road ahead will be difficult.  But a obstacles are there to stop people who don't want it badly enough.

I look forward to returning to Haiti as often as possible and continuing to develop relationships with the medical community. In the meantime, I'll learn French and leave the husband finding to God.