Letting Go

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So I recently got some really bad news. When I received this news I thought my heart would shatter into a million pieces. I  mean I have worked so hard for this.  So I wallowed in self pity for a bit. I ranted to everyone who cared to hear: bureaucracy sucks! And now I'm ready to take ownership. Everything happens for a reason. There is no point in harping over it now. All I can do is put my best foot forward and hope for the best.

Then something really amazing happen! I ran into an old friend who I had some previously unresolved issues with. Okay, so I'm not one to hold grudges: they take way to much energy to maintain. And the person that your begrudging is usually completely unaware of the slight. So I try to nip negative energy in the bum ASAP. But this was a very unique case. Anyone who knows me  knows how often I have tried to process how my relationship with this person ended and how something so amazing turned sour. P.S. No one likes a broken record!

So ya, I was  salty about the whole thing for a long while. But after years of trying to figure things out. I finally decided to just let it go a couple months back. I mean REALLY let it all go. I prayed about  it and released it. You can not image how ridiculously refreshing it feels to just let stuff go. Whatever the reason for holding on may be-justice, the need for closure, bitterness, grief, whatever- just let it go! It is a lot easier than I imagined it would be. My only regret is that I didn't make up my mind to let it go sooner!

So,  I ran into this person. Generally our encounters are brief and upsetting (for me anyway) but for the first time it was easy, genuine again. And we were able to fall into a conversation about our past friendship. We were able to forgive each other (yes, there are always two sides to a story if you are willing to listen) and make peace. Who knew that a chat at Starbucks could end so magnificently!

It took 3.5 years! Although we lacked the maturity and courage to address each other earlier, I think we both have grown from this experience. I, for one, am going to stick to my no grudges rule-no more exceptions!

I have also come to understand that there are no good or bad people; there are only good and bad actions. We can make a case for trends, but there are very few saints and and abundance of sinners. I know that there are real world consequences for our actions and repeat behavior, whether good or bad, develops our character. But I believe that anyone can fall, and anyone can be redeemed.

I was so ridiculously energized by the encounter, I can't even be upset about my bad news. Bureaucracy still sucks, but life is good! 

PEACE, JOY, HAPPINESS!